Momma Mia… An Invitation🫣

I’ve been invited to a wedding in Italy. It sounds romantic and joyful. And yet, my first response?  Flying and travelling alone = Discomfort 🙃  

I don’t know why, but it seems that airports have a way of activating every nerve ending in my body the moment I walk through those sliding doors. I seem to forget how zippers, passports, and basic decision-making work.

So, there’s a part of me that would be perfectly happy staying home. Safe. Predictable. Fine.

And so often, this is what we do because we are wired for familiarity. We cling to what’s known, even when it no longer serves us. Psychologists call it status quo bias — the pull to keep things as they are simply because they are familiar.

But often there is an even deeper discomfort in living out of alignment with our values. And if I’m honest, there’s a quiet, persistent nudge in me that knows not showing up to a dear friend's wedding wouldn’t sit right. It wouldn’t feel aligned with who I am — someone who values connection, celebration, and being present for the people I care about. And, that knowing matters more to me than the uncertainty of flying or travelling alone. My integrity is asking more of me than my discomfort.

This is when things get tricky….

Our brains prioritize energy efficiency.  It loves predictability and avoids discomfort. So when we have a routine that ‘works’, the brain says- just stay there; tolerating dissatisfaction over uncertainty.

But choosing to feel “fine” over courage keeps us small, and is often misaligned with who we want to be and what gives our lives meaning.  For that, we need to stretch, to feel unsure, to wobble.

Just as we are told to lift heavy weights to offset the natural decline in our bodies' strength, the same is true for our choices. If we want emotional strength, resilience, and a wider window of tolerance, we have to “lift heavy” in our lives too. We have to practice doing hard things. Small stretches. Brave conversations. New experiences.  

So I am going to Italy, and yes, discomfort will be packed in my suitcase. It will whisper worst-case scenarios while I stand in the wrong queue. It will remind me how easy it would be to stay home.  

And I will let it know that I hear it, but I am choosing to move beyond ‘fine’ and will be wobbling off to Italy anyway.